I am just reactive. I am reacting to good things and I feel others hear things wrong or somehow take everything sideways.so the balance is off. I heard from a poster at website A that I needed to unconfuse. I am doing that. I am saying being balanced it impossible.
Writing a thing in order, etwas, this is a song, a masterpiece you are already loving, this song isn't about love. It is Love; combined without a side, bottom or top; Is love.
Once boundaries are confounded and thus contained it -UN-imprisioned, translated through cyberspace no longer is contained by definition and is. It is no longer words on a page telling nor showing where this love, song is. If this is possible then---
My effort is to make this a transmission of real space filling emotion, as long as it is being read through here; and that is a place in the heart as that organ is here. I thought briefly of holding the reader captive through making dependence upon the writer, but as that the love, or song or organ, is an organ it can not be.
I thought once can not meant; can only exist in spirit, less than ether, or non-existent type imprisoned inside of paragraphs and periods. Can not isn't that nor can be intended to; can not be means rather, resides inside of us.
I am not as mad anymore. I just checked myself out and have a lot to admit to and say: Is any of it important? Maybe I want to make friends and try too hard in other areas and so the balance thing exists in my brain or heart and eyes and so is as balanced as I can be independent but the reader going on ahead of me and contained without me knowing isn't happening. Isn't happening. I guess this makes me and the reader and my organs a transform or transforms, but exists inside of me and boundlessness will reach the reader intact.
I will certainly try from here on to be more clear, to ask for help once in a while and come. I have to remember the sex part of my makeup. I have to stay clear of cigarettes. I drink occasionally and love it. I look at porn. (a lot, when I do)
Maybe I will post pics and shape up my blog.
Peace
Xoxo
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